iFunny

I'm blatantly borrowing this from my brother, since it's too funny not to share:

If I was working for Apple, I'd suggest the following products. I doubt they will ever be brought to market but you never know. Let's go, Steve Jobs, get on it...



• iBall – Good for throwing, catching, kicking, bouncing and rolling but tends to turn red and have that “glazed” look when exposed to marijuana smoke.

• iDrops – For use on the iBall after being exposed to marijuana smoke to combat redness and the glazed look.

• iLid – Used to cover the iBall, especially in “sleep” mode. Also enables "wink" and "blink" functions.

• iLash – Add-on accessory for the iLid, it helps keep dust and debris away from the iBall. Extensions available.

• iShadow – Optional color schemes for the iLid.

• iLiner – Used to accent the iBall for a sexier look. For use primarily by females, rock stars and actors.

• iBrow – Generally attached above the iLid for aesthetic purposes but can be plucked or waxed to adjust shape. Use in conjuction with iBrowpencil.

• iGlasses – Helps to keep the iBall in focus, especially as it gets older.

• iContacts – An advanced version of the iGlasses, it attaches itself directly to the iBall, eliminating the need for an external frame.

• iDunno – For use by kids (my nephew has been field testing this for a while now) to answer adult’s questions when they know they’ve screwed up but can’t think of a good excuse when confronted. Other variations include “iCantremember” and “iDontrecall.”

• iRate – For use by adults when stupid kids use the iDunno too frequently.

• iSlapyourhead – For use by adults on stupid kids when the iRate just doesn’t seem to be working. Definitely one of the most underused products today.

• iKickyour@$$ - For use when iSlapyourhead is not effective. Not necessarily for everyday use but if it must be utilized, apply liberally.