Smeagol is Free!
A hermitudinal view of...stuff...


Despair: The Tender Seed

Psalm 93
The LORD reigns, He is clothed with majesty; the LORD has clothed and girded Himself with strength; indeed, the world is firmly established, it will not be moved. Your throne is established from of old; You are everlasting. The floods have lifted up, O LORD, the floods have lifted up their voice, the floods lift up their pounding waves. More than the sounds of many waters, than the mighty breakers of the sea, the LORD on high is mighty. Your testimonies are fully confirmed; holiness befits Your house, O LORD, forevermore.

Psalm 8
O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is Your name in all the earth, who have displayed Your splendor above the heavens! From the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have established strength because of Your adversaries, to make the enemy and the revengeful cease. When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, the moon and the stars, which You have ordained; what is man that You take thought of him, and the son of man that You care for him? Yet You have made him a little lower than God, and You crown him with glory and majesty! You make him to rule over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen, and also the beast of the field, the birds of the heavens and the fish of the sea, whatever passes through the paths of the seas. O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is Your name in all the earth!

The past couple of days, the LORD has seen fit to remind me of who He is. Despair is very, very near to me, for I cannot look within myself and see anything good. Though my flesh would love to cling to this seemingly small deceit, the very character of God is spoken against when I live in such a way as to trust in or proclaim my own goodness. Sin still manifests itself in my heart, and I would cling to my own supposed goodness: such is my reaction to His holy character. Why do I shy away from the His sovereign hand? Why do I run from His holy presence? *Sigh*...

Yet despair does not win; the beautiful, breathtaking truth of the matter is that God has ordained this, and He has granted me salvation. The very despair that He places within me is the tender seed of humility that calls me back to Him. In His kindness He beckons to me, reminding me that no good thing can come from my sin-stained hands, and that it is only the blood of the Lamb that cleanses me and makes me holy. He points me to the cross, showing me again that my sin has been atoned for, and all His goodness to me is found to flow from that sacred fountain of innocent, sacrificial blood. He pulls me eyes up to see Christ risen and seated at His right hand, majestic and glorious, ever interceding on my behalf, longing for the day when He sees His bride glorified and holy in linens clean and bright. 'Tis a salvation of grace, not of law, for no good thing can come of my own hands. Nay, He Himself is my only good, the very light of hope that casts out the darkness of deepening despair.

posted by Bolo | 9:21 PM
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