Smeagol is Free!
A hermitudinal view of...stuff...


That Thing I Do

During the course of a conversation the other night, I discovered something about myself. While some people do things because they're challenging, I do things because I love to do them...and in the course of doing them, I usually find them to be challenging. The point is, my motive for doing comes in that order, not the other way around.

A little background before I go further. I'm the type of person who, in the midst of finals, will stop studying just to go watch a sunset. Or listen to the birds sing. Or roll around in the grass. Why, you ask? Why not? I think I would rather be caught laughing and dancing in the rain than studying hard for a math final. Not to say that I won't study for my math final (which, by the way, will need to be done this Spring...ugh!). It's just that I hate to think that I'll forget to enjoy the little things in life...the simple pleasures, the silly things, the profundity to be seen in all that surrounds around us. A little over a month ago, I wrote a post about how the Lord commands the morning. I hate to think that in the midst of all of life's trials, struggles, and challenges, that I've somehow missed something.

Thus, we come back to my original strain of thought. I love to do the things I love to do because...well...first and foremost, I love them. They're enjoyable, I take pleasure in them, and when I do them, I realize with vivid freshness that the Lord has made me to do them. It's like that when I write, when I surf, when I teach, when I somehow pull an analogy out of my butt, when I play volleyball, when I pray, when I talk about the Lord, when I hug my nephews, when I put together another one of my journals (if you'd like to see it...ask me may actually make it onto one, one of these days), or when I watch a sunset. The Lord made me to do those things...and you know what? That's why I love to do what I do. I think that, in the course of doing the things I love to do the most, I find that they are challenging...but they still come easily to me. That's a scary thought. I love to's challenging...but words flow unabated from me like a freshet. I love to teach...and often, in the midst of trying to explain something, analogy after analogy will pop up over and over again. I can't explain how it happens, it just does. Even though it's challenging, I still find that teaching comes naturally.

That scares me.

Do you know why? It's a responsibility issue. *Sigh*...God made me this way for a reason...and, unlike some others that I know, I'm not the type of person who dives into something just because they present a challenge. I'll have to remember that as I set out to be used for His kingdom...I'll have to remember that I love to do what I do because they not only bring me pleasure, but they bring Him pleasure, as well :)

posted by Bolo | 1:36 PM
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